Jealousy is like boomerang, it comes in the most unexpected way and time. We hate it, but we need it!
First what you should know, there are two types of jealousy. Yes, two types! 🙂 We can call them good and bad jealousy, or healthy and unhealthy jealousy and there is a hudge difference between these two. The line between them is very tight, so it is very important to know how to distinguish good, healthy jealousy from a bad, unhealthy one.
Jealousy is an attribute, emotion, the state of mind which is not a sin in itself. Actually jealousy is a great invention. How it can be? Well jealousy, I mean here the “good one”, is nothing more and nothing less than reaching up. It is wanting, wishing to be better, to be holier, to be more perfect, to be one step further from where you are now. This is your sparkle which push you up. This is a source of your motivation. It works a bit like an invitation. It shows you ideals, goals, levels which you can achieve and ivites you: Let’s just go there. Let’s do something someting good, something beautiful, something better. So don’t be afraid to be jealous! It is not that a good man, a good Christian can not feel jealousy. Imagine, you meet someone in your life, who is a better speaker, manager or better golf player than you and you are realizing that you are getting jealous. It is not that you want push him down, but instead you want to get to the same level like that person, you want to follow him, want to learn from him. Then this is good. This is healthy, good jealousy 🙂 You have nothing to worry!
But of course it can happen that this healthy jealousy will change into bad one. I believe that each one of us can feel when it’s good and when it’s bad emotion. Good jealousy leads to development. It doesn’t deny the other person. It doesn’t create unhealty relations. It doesn’t wish bad upon others. It doesn’t criticize. It doesn’t want to smash the other person. Good jealousy just makes you GROW. So what to do if you notice that what you feel is a bad version of jealousy?
First of all please stop concentrate on negative emotion itself. You feel it, and you know that this is unhealty. So it is very good message to you. The question is what will you do with this message? Will you take an action and work on it or will you stay passive and let it work in you?
I recommend to use this bad jealousy as a footnote for yourself. A footnote within you will answer to the following questions: How does (or maybe to be more specific to what exactly) this unhealthy jealousy relate to you? And what does it tell about you? It will help you to get to the roots of your problem. But, if you will focus on what to do to not have this bad feeling or how to deal with the person of whom you are jealous, you will lose yourself, because this is the way to nothing. I’ve already made such an experiance and I’m sure that you as well. Just imagine that you have a flu and you use only symptomatic treatment completely forgetting about causative treatment. After a week you will notice that it brought not to much change and you are still sick. It doesn’t sound good, does it? My dear readers please use this bad jealousy as a sign, because it shows us that there inside of us is a part where we don’t feel peace, where we don’t accept ouerselves, where we feel hate for ouerselves, where we reject ourselves, where we are angry on ourselves. Please use this sign and ask yourselves why you are jealous? Of what are you jealous? To which situations does it relate? And find where is it in you? What kind of nagation is in you? Dig this out and do something with it! Dont let this boomerang come back 🙂
Good luck!